My first oncology appointment.

First appt with oncologist went well. She is a tiny little thing, about my age. And she probably has a really big brain. Lots of smarts. I liked her, Ryan liked her, so we will go with her.

My diagnosis is still not clear, though. I have lymphoma, but it is indistinguishable between classic Hodgkin lymphoma and diffuse large B-cell lymphoma. I have to be so difficult! Apparently this is not common, for this to happen. The pathology report from Mayo clinic favors the diffuse large B-cell lymphoma, though, so she said we will go with that for now, and she feels confident that we can go ahead with starting the staging process. She did say that either lymphoma does well with chemo and the cancer cells will just "melt away". Ooh, melt away. I picture a big ol' scoop of lard just oozing away. I was going to say butter, but that would ruin my love of butter, so we'll go with lard, because ain't no chance you'll see me eating a large scoop of lard. The dr will further look into finding out which dx I have, she'll talk to the pathologist both at St Mary's and Mayo, and we'll see what they say. How many people can say they've stumped Mayo Clinic? I have! Neener. ;)

Now, to clarify for those of you who don't know much, if anything at all, about lymphoma. Here's what the dr told us. Staging with lymphoma is different than staging with any other kind of cancer. When you are staged with, say, stage IV lung cancer, or stage III/IV breast cancer, it means that it is more advanced, involving other organs, tissues, and that it has spread. With lymphoma, staging just is saying how much of the body has the cancer cells, it does not mean that it is more advanced. So stage I is not "better" than stage IV, as far as being curable. It just means that more lymph nodes and organs are involved, but are just as treatable as the stage I. I hope that made sense.

So, here is my list of tests that I will be having in the next few days: CT of abdomen and pelvis, PET scan, MUGHA scan (to test my heart, should be fine, but it is done as a precautionary), Bone Marrow Biopsy ( I made SURE that I would be knocked out during that test. She said I will be sedated. Yessss...), and I will have a port placed. A port is put in under my skin, in my chest, and it will be where I will have the chemo done. I wonder if I can put beer through my port... Ooh, fun little game! ;). And as soon as they find out what the bone marrow scan (results take 3-4 days) and what is really going on with me, I could start chemo the next day. So, maybe next week?! I can't wait? No really, I can't wait!

As we walked in to the back area, where I met the dr, we passed the area where few people were getting their chemo treatments. When I saw that, it felt reeeeeaaalllly surreal. I was going to be one of those people in those chairs, with that IV machine, being infused or whatever. I cried in the exam room, just for half a minute, but then I was fine. I will get through this. I have to get through this. It will be a blip in my life, something that we will remember as a hard time, but something that was necessary to live through. For what reason I was "given" this disease, I don't know. But you know what....cancer is going regret that it ever messed with me, because it ain't gonna be welcome in my home no more. It's gots to go. Sheeeeeeeiiiiit. ;)